A Message for Every Season

As we head into the final stretch of the year, I want to offer a holiday message that grew directly out of our October 30 Local Leadership Chat. It was one of the most honest gatherings we have ever had together. The conversation was full of candor, courage, frustration, hope, and the kind of truth-telling that only happens when people feel safe enough to speak plainly.

In the very first minutes, leaders shared the stress they carry. More than a third of participants said their civic leadership stress was “high” or “very high.” For many, it felt validating simply to see the numbers. For others, it felt like a mirror held up to what they had been trying to shoulder quietly.

One person put it this way: “There’s more demand than there is supply of staff. It’s been a long time of doing more with less, and you really feel the impact of it.” Someone else spoke about watching colleagues “on the brink of not knowing how much more stress they can handle.”

Another leader reflected on trying to protect staff from dysfunction at the top, saying, “I did everything I could to shoulder all of it and protect my staff from it. They had no idea what was going on behind the scenes.” Another shared the heartbreak of leaving for their own well-being, only to worry, “I left with my integrity, but I knew my staff would be next.”

And then there was the loneliness that so many described but rarely say aloud. One person admitted they were “on the verge of resigning,” adding, “You are only a leader if somebody is following, and I am not sure I can get through to them.” Another reflected on the emotional toll of feeling blamed for everything: “You absorb anger. You try not to, but you do. And then you feel guilty for not meeting everyone’s expectations.”

These are not small things. These are not passing frustrations. These are real burdens carried by people who care.

And that is why I want to offer this: give yourself the gift of grace this season. In the second half of our chat, we turned the question around and asked everyone: What keeps you centered or resilient when things get tough?

The answers were as thoughtful as they were brave.

One person shared, “My husband keeps asking why I can’t be home by five like everyone else. That’s the voice I hear when I need to set boundaries.” Another spoke about blocking out time every morning for exercise or quiet: “You cannot pour from an empty cup.”

Someone else talked about sending handwritten thank-you notes even to people they disagree with. “Thank you for bringing a different perspective,” they write. “It has opened up conversations I never thought would happen.”

Another leader said their grounding practice was simple: “I remind myself I don’t know everything, and that’s why we listen. My superpower is asking questions.”

And one person distilled it to a truth we all felt: “It helps just to know I’m not alone.”

As the year draws to a close, that is the invitation I want to leave with you.

Before you step into 2026, give yourself the grace to slow down.

Give yourself the grace to acknowledge what this year has taken out of you.

Give yourself the grace to recognize that leadership does not require martyrdom.

Give yourself the grace to clean up whatever messes the year has left behind without punishing yourself for being human.

And give yourself the grace to enter the new year with a plan to sustain yourself, not just to endure.

This is a holiday message, yes. But it is also a message for every season. A message for anyone carrying the weight of local leadership and trying to do it with integrity, compassion, and steadiness.